Archive for the ‘The Blessing of a Fetish’ Category

The Blessing of a Fetish   6 comments

PUGSLEY

Fetish.  Even the word sounds creepy.  You picture a fat red-headed thirty-year-old guy in a gravy-stained striped shirt resembling Pugsley from the Addams Family.  He’s voraciously wringing his freckled hands together while he has deviant sexual thoughts, much too abnormal to verbalize. He’ll later masturbate for hours in the privacy of his bedroom to his favorite website depicting female gynecological medical procedures, suppressing his moans of ecstasy as he completes all over his keyboard.

The truth is, although even the word fetish sounds perverted, it’s far from it.  We all have at least one.  Some of them are relatively tame and barely on the cusp of being taboo.  Others are really shocking to those of us who are simply turned on by things like having sex in pubic.  But fetishes are an innate part of the human sexual psyche that can not be simply cast off or ignored because they are too embarrassing for public consumption.

NATIONAL FETISH APPRECIATION DAY

People with taboo fetishes, or fetishes they consider taboo, go through life suppressing this embarrassing “abnormality” they are constantly tempted to act on.   However acting on one is often out of the question by the extreme fear someone will find out.   If you’re a guy, you’ll have to join the mafia, later turn government informant and consequently disappear into the witness protection program where you can start life again without being known as the guy who sniffs the chair every time a woman stands up.

You can not “give-up” a fetish like you can playing a sport.  It owns you.  It’s like being a homosexual and deciding you will not be attracted to your own sex anymore.  Try and convince your genitals of that.  And unless it involves something to do with minors, violence or death, why in the world would you want to get rid of it?   There should be a National Fetish Appreciation Day.  People should be grateful they have something that makes them completely sexually charged simply by just the thought of it.   Sexual stimulation and orgasms are the perks of having to drag around a human body and deal with all its inconveniences, aches and pains.   You should enjoy whatever can put you in that state ecstasy.  Unless you are living in the state of Alabama.  Then it’s probably illegal.

And if you think you are the only person who wants to be put in diapers and treated like a baby, go online.   There are countless web sites, videos, picture galleries and groups for almost any fetish you can imagine.  Plus you can browse to your heart’s content in complete anonymity.  The days of hiding in the back of an adult book store with your feet stuck to the floor searching for something that kind of depicts your fetish are long gone.   Just the fact that there are all these web sites dealing with your particular fetish proves you are not alone.   Chances are, you’ll find you are not all that over the top either.

THE POLICE DON”T GIVE SPANKINGS

Want to be spanked by someone in a position of authority?  I once had a friend who actually called the police and requested a police woman come over and spank him for real.   I actually saw him slumping down in the front seat of a police car as a police-woman drove him to an empty parking lot to explain why what he did was inappropriate.   I think that turned him on even more.  And when she was done lecturing him he still asked for his spanking.

But for those of you who don’t chose to interact with the law, there are service providers out there catering to every fetish imaginable.   Naturally, you can find them on the internet.   And these men and women are professionals, not prostitutes.   They will not have sex, although clients are encouraged to have a sexual release.   They will however help you explore your fetish by creating your ultimate fetish fantasy.  I think this is an important service long overdue.

BECOMING YOUR FETISH

For those with a really open line of communication with their significant other, spouse or friend with benefits, you might feel comfortable about sharing your fetish with them.   And if it doesn’t involve an animal they might be willing to help you indulge    Your partner might even enjoy it as well.   But you must be cognizant of their sexual needs too.   If every time you get in bed you want your man to slap your face and treat you like a slut, he’s going to want some regular loving sex as well.  Be careful not to become your fetish.

BLESSING OF THE FETISHES

Every year in San Francisco’s grand Grace Cathedral atop prestigious Nob Hill, there is a Blessing of the Animals.   People come in droves to have their dogs, cats, birds, snakes and other pets blessed by St. Francis, the Patron Saint of Animals.   This is because animals are a blessing on earth.   They are loyal, loving and harbor no ill will unless defending themselves.

Fetishes are the same way.   They are completely harmless and bring joy to people’s lives.   And if you are religious they are even God-given, although many would argue the almighty fucked up.  Yet many of the people who have them are humiliated to entertain such thoughts.  That’s why Grace Cathedral needs to have a Blessing of the Fetishes once a year.   People can go there without revealing their fetishes, but still be blessed.   It would be a way of letting them know not only is it alright to have them, but they are a blessing.

Think what your life would be like if you are a man and didn’t have the daily excitement of possibly hearing a woman fart?    Or the building crescendo if you’re a woman from peering at guys crotches all day because the bulge makes you almost orgasmic.   What would you do to fill the void?  Concentrate on work?   Volunteer to help the homeless?  Become a right-wing Christian?  Farts and bulges are far more titillating.

FANTASY ISLAND

I can’t tell you not to be embarrassed about your fetish or fetishes.  I’m certainly embarrassed about mine.  And unless you find an island where everyone is into the same behavior, you’ll probably always keep it on the QT.   But it doesn’t mean you still can’t enjoy them.  Some just use their minds.  Some use the internet.  Some find willing partners.  However it’s all good.  Furthermore, you can not call fetishes a deviation if everybody has them.  They are in our brains for a reason.   I feel it’s for our pleasure.  It is human beings who have labeled them taboo.   It’s our society who has framed them too humiliating to share.   But we can change this.   We must open our minds to what’s out there.  Consequently, in the long run we’ll all feel less abnormal about our fetishes.   Now, please excuse me while I drink from the toilet.

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